Do you find that your thoughts are preparing you for disappointment? You think about the worst case scenario, so you can prepare yourself or not get your hopes up too much. Creating a false sense of control over disappointment if things don’t work out. I know I can do that.
In my personal experience, I didn’t want to believe our positive pregnancy test result. We had many false starts. Even after a positive blood test I still could not relax and believe it was actually happening. It wasn’t until the first scan that I started to believe that we were going to have a baby.
What’s that about?
Well your thoughts are trying to shield you, with good intention, from further disappointment or pain. In the bargain it prevents you from relaxing and enjoying the good stuff, just in case it gets taken away. However, take a step back and ask yourself if this strategy is working for you.
This very thought process actually creates more disappointment. Looking at the down side of situations and opportunities. Thinking ahead and second guessing what might happen rather than allowing yourself to be in the reality of the here and now – which is always better than the illusion of the thoughts in your head.
Insecurity and imagination are a toxic combination. When we feel insecure our imagination can take over. When that happens, our feelings go along with our imaginations and so do our thoughts. Our mind cannot tell the difference between imagination and reality; you therefore experience the false reality created by your insecurities and imagination.
Once you are aware of these facts, you will become aware of your thoughts and will be able to break away and return to the present. Any thought that is not in the present moment is fantasy. Nothing can predict the future including your thoughts. Only the present moment is real.
Imagination is wonderful, exploring possibilities, future ideas and being open to creativity. Problems arise when we allow imagination to get the better of us. Worrying about future outcomes or trying to protect yourself from possible future scenarios only takes you away from what is real.
Allow yourself to be in the present moment. Forget about future events and see what you are in the here and now. Spend a moment tuning into your body and the here and now, break up the party that sometimes kicks off in your head!