Yes I still longed for someone to call me ‘daddy’, however my sense of peace and wellbeing was no longer dependent on it. I had found a place of peace.
Inner peace is within you.
You don’t have go to India to find it or meditate for an hour to find it. I would go as far as to say you don’t really need to use hypnosis to find it (but I’ll come back to that!). It is not dependent on your fertility, a positive test result or anything external, you have it already within you.
I know this is probably very hard to believe, but please stick with me. I’ve been there. There were points on our fertility journey I wasn’t sure whether we would make it, as a couple, everything, our happiness our future seemed so lost. I didn’t have any sense of a future, couldn’t picture a future as it appeared we ‘were allowed’ (my belief) what we wanted. I felt stuck, trapped, in-prisoned in a life that I didn’t want or expect, feeling anything but peace.
We are born with a natural state of wellbeing and inner peace. That is our natural default state. Look at children, the way they play, are in the moment. They don’t worry about the future, they are so much in the here and now.
What happens is we live in a culture where school, parents, society essentially put expectations on us, we start to worry more about what others think, what we ‘should’ do in situations to meet others expectations, what the ‘right’ thing to do is in any given situation. Over time we lose a sense of self. A sense of our own inner wisdom, it gets drowned out by thought.
That’s what happens your inner peace – it is drowned out by thought.
But it has never gone away. It is always there.
Your thoughts paint a picture of ‘reality’ that is not true but we believe it because our thoughts deceive us. Then that leads to another thought about what we are going to do about the situation (‘reality’) that the first thought created. Our thoughts are excellent at hypnosis, they hypnotise us to believe them (which is why I believe hypnosis can he powerful in changing our quality of thinking and letting go of the cause of our unhelpful thinking).
On our fertility journey my thoughts were telling me we would never be fulfilled or find happiness until we had our own family. It is the same of a lot of my clients.
You may notice how sometimes you feel better and more at peace about things than others? What has changed? Probably nothing significant in your situation. It is your thinking. You cannot have a thought without a feeling so your feelings are a barometer to the quality of your thinking.
This is not just about positive thinking. It is seeing all thought for what it is, just thought, not truth. When you become aware of that then the brass band of thought dies down and you become aware of the still soft flute of your inner peace, inner wisdom that is probably telling you you are going to be OK whatever happens.
I had an awaking that made me realise my happiness wasn’t dependent on having a baby. Yes I still longed for someone to call me ‘daddy’, however my sense of peace and wellbeing was no longer dependent on it. We had found a place of peace, without giving up. You can find that to. If you think I can help then let me know.
Put your hand on your stomach. What does your inner wisdom say about your situation?